5 Things to Say During a Friend Breakup
Before I get into friend breakups one-liners, I want to address the recent events happening this week with the attacks of Asian Americans. It’s heartbreaking, exhausting, and tiring to see what’s happening in our country.
It’s made me reflect on my entire life being an Asian American and realizing some of the traumas I’ve experienced would have panned out differently if I was white (I had to say it because it's uncomfortably true).
I think change happens in the world when we have the courage to disrupt the system, and I will do anything I can to get up there and shake things up because why not me?
Most importantly, if you’re an Asian American, please take care of yourself and take breaks from the media for your mental peace and sanity. We have to.
Now back to friend breakups!
Friend breakups have been a common theme in my life since I started my personal development journey. When you're on the path of transformation, self-love, and boundary setting, you will inevitably lose friends.
People that are the closest to us may attach their identity to us at a subconscious level. Every relationship is a mirror. When we veer off a path they are not ready for, tension arises because people who see you moving forward when they’re not ready will fight like hell to stay where they are.
When friends can’t support our journey and take us back from our growth, we have to let them go or set boundaries so we can peacefully walk into the version we’re trying to become.
Here are 5 things to say in a friend breakup as recommended by my therapist and life coach!
You’re taking me back on my healing journey, and I no longer feel comfortable staying in this friendship.
Friendships last for a season, a reason, or a lifetime and it’s time I accept our season of friendship has come to an end.
I have found friends that have validated and celebrated my presence, and you haven’t made me feel that way, so I have to redirect my energy to those who are there for me.
It’s normal for friends to outgrow each other, and there will only be resistance if we stay in this friendship. It’s best to let each other go.
My decision to end this friendship will never diminish the good memories we’ve had. I will always care for you, but where I am at with my life, I can only continue to do so from a distance.
I have used all of them with the many friend breakups I had the past year. I will say these statements help you be assertive in breaking up with someone and trying to hold compassion for the person you’re hurting.
Friend breakups are never easy because you can’t control the way someone responds to your boundaries. In my experience, every friend’s response to me rejecting them was not well received. They responded with hurtful comments that reaffirmed my reasons to let them go.
You’re not responsible, nor can you control their response to your boundaries.
Sincerely,
Mary
For more stories and updates on Mary’s work, subscribe to her Newsletter here
