I Can’t Stop Breaking Up With Friends

In the past year, I have broken up with 3 best friends. 3 best friends whom I stood with them at their wedding as a bridesmaid. 😱

Yes, I know. It’s pretty crazy.

The first breakup was easy because we just drifted apart and didn’t even have a breakup convo! However, the breakup happened in my head while I walked down the aisle at her wedding...awkward!

The second one was awful because she couldn’t let our friendship go, and I had to end it several times in one convo 😬

The third one was an empowered decision because I recognized the trauma bond we had within our friendship, and we both were held back from healing our childhood wounds by being attached to each other. She was hurt but respected my boundaries.

I was feeling down about the types of relationships I have allowed into my life when I read these TikTok creator’s words👇🏼

Before I knew who I was, I felt responsible for managing the emotions of others...even their traumas.

I was very co-dependent, so naturally, I would be attracted to people who were not managing their emotions or traumas (hey, narcissists!).

They would play the victim.

They wouldn’t change.

They would run in circles with the same problems over and over again or blame me.

And at the time of meeting these women, I was also at this place. Misery loves company, after all, but now that I’m healing my childhood trauma and changing my core beliefs down to my nervous system, (thank you, EMDR!) all of my relationships have shifted.

One of the core beliefs I have now cultivated is worthiness. I am inherently worthy without the validation or expectations of others. I now feel this not just cognitively but in every cell of my body along with my soul. (Again, thank you EMDR)

When you begin healing, it’s natural for relationships to shift with those attached to a version of you that made them feel better about themselves.

You don’t have to stay in places that trigger you. You can walk away, which I have chosen to do.

If you relate to this story, I am sending you so much love and healing because detaching from the pain of others as an empath is an evolving practice.

You can love people who are not healthy for you from a distance.

You always have authority over your peace, and once you’re on the path of learning who you are, you’ll never stay in places compromising your identity ever again.

Sincerely,

Mary

Writing Affirmation:
If you let fear keep you from sharing your story, you'll never give yourself the chance to meet people who will feel seen, heard, and visible from your story. You'll never give yourself the chance to meet people who will fall in love with your courageous heart.

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